What to Do If You Can't Get Past Your Partner's Infidelity

Infidelity can be the most painful, heartbreaking, and strenuous situation that any couple has to face. The betrayal of the one person you trust the most can lead to confusion, grief, loss, and, most likely, anger. Moving past unfaithfulness is not a simple task, and can feel absolutely impossible. You may be stuck wondering, "What do I do now?" Take a breath, be patient, and try these tips.

Acknowledge Your Pain

First and foremost, take time to identify every emotion you are currently feeling. Before you can even think about moving forward, you must be self-aware. Allow yourself to feel each emotion fully. Anything and everything you feel is valid, and one way or another, these emotions are going to come to light. Don't fight it, just ride the wave. Bottling these up will only lead to more pain and suffering down the road, and will delay the healing process.

Communicate with Your Partner

It may be difficult to even look your partner in the eye, but remember that you have every right to communicate to them how their actions made you feel. Having these conversations can be painful, but it is important to understand why and how the infidelity happened.

This does not mean you have to accept excuses, but knowing the context can sometimes provide closure. Take your time and set boundaries with yourself on how much you can handle at a time. Even if you can't seem to move past their infidelity, still let them know where you are emotionally and mentally.

Take Care of Yourself

In the aftermath of infidelity, self-care is more important than ever. Focus on activities that bring you joy, happiness, and peace of mind. Exercise, eat-well, get plenty of sleep, and surround yourself with people who love and support you. Do not overly exert your energy on conversations or people who do not make you feel whole. If you need time and space away from your partner before you make a decision on whether to leave, take it.

Set Boundaries and Expectations

No matter what you decide to do, set boundaries with your partner moving forward. Express your wants and needs in the relationship to make sure that you feel safe and valued. Tell your partner what is and is not expected moving forward, and what behaviors you will no longer tolerate.

This may include transparency with technology, consistent communication, or specific actions your partners can take to rebuild trust. If you find that there is nothing else you need from your partner, that is also something to communicate.

Explore Empathy

Empathy is imperative when it comes to healing the wounds of infidelity. If you and your partner try to make an effort to heal the relationship, empathy is going to play a significant role.

The betrayed partner needs to know that the person who was unfaithful fully understands what their actions caused. This may take practice and time. Trying to explain these feelings can be challenging, which is why it may feel that you are not fully over the infidelity in the first place. However, if your partner is willing to put in the work, they will be okay with you dwelling on the situation.

Decide What's Best for You

Ultimately, the decision of whether to stay in the relationship is up to you. This may mean that the best thing is for the relationship to end. If you find that you cannot seem to move past the betrayal no matter how hard you and your partner tried, it may be best to let the relationship end. This does not mean you failed. It just means that this was not your person, and it's okay to move on to something better.

If you find yourself struggling with the feelings of anger and betrayal after infidelity, reach out today for affair recovery.